Loneliness - it's not just a word, this state. And more specifically - a state of mind. Man is born, lives, grows, develops, grows among the same people, as he did. From childhood he was in society - a kindergarten, school, further education, work. Is it possible in this case to call a man alone, he's always in the team? It turns out you can ambien buy online. And let live on this earth a few billion people, but there are those who, in the most numerous society feel lonely.And there is no dictionary that treats loneliness, do not explain the essence of this state, which is called the soul or spiritual loneliness.You can feel lonely in a crowded party, fun and absolutely be far from alone in his apartment, lying on the couch with a book in your hands or just dreaming about something, his eyes closed.If people can not find your soul mate, his love, he also feels lonely.Maybe he's just shy and timid, he is not sure of his appeal, he is afraid to become acquainted with the girl or guy. To improve self-esteem, shyness, there are various suppression techniques to help lonely people overcome their fears, increase their self-esteem and learn on an equal footing to communicate with others, as well as with the opposite sex.One such tool is the pickup, allowing develop the ability to easily communicate with an unknown girl or guy, interest them, to develop further our relations with them.This technique will help you to feel like Alpha, learn to be the soul of the company, meet and maintain relationships with people and, eventually, to love yourself. Get used to be responsible for various activities, not to be afraid of meetings and visits with people who tie romantic acquaintances. All that you the strength you need only to believe in yourself.Basically, all the problems - it is our lack of understanding of their behavior, their significance in this world, his personal appeal. Failure to understand that everything is subject to man - and cost only want to make this a little bit of effort. And freed from the oppression of solitude, you will be able to help other people, your friends, your relatives to get rid of this painful feelings and find its rightful place in life.
LAZINESS as a protective response. Sometimes the reluctance to do anything is the result of physical or mental overload. We physiologists have such a term - "protective inhibition". Its essence is this: one who works for a long time to wear one day I will find the basic forces - the body simply refuse to obey him. All of a sudden want to lie on the couch with a book, chat with friends on the phone or the web, but in a pinch just to sleep in an unscheduled day. This "lazy" usually suffer those who are called "workaholics" - for whatever reason, they work, as they say, 25 hours a day. And when the body is protected from such activities, workaholic says to himself: "Something I now grow lazy, it's not right." And gradually we began to work at least a sense of guilt that he was "lazy." And some very strong-willed person "struggling" with it, forcing myself to such periods, get out of bed and run. At the same productivity and quality drop sharply (not surprisingly), a growing discontent, which again leads to a drop in productivity and so on.
The same thing happens when the body tries to recover at least partially - that is, the workflow goes, but with reduced intensity. And the man again began reproaching himself, sits up overtime to make up for its slow pace, doing everything from fatigue more slowly allows more errors, etc. It seems to work, but no results. It turns an "imitation of violent activity," and frankly unhealthy.
HOW LAZINESS lack of motivation. Typically, this is a consequence of unconscious resistance to the man who in his heart suddenly begins to feel that sort of not quite go up and not doing something. In such cases, to accuse him of laziness begin around - particularly those who need it to perform the work that he does not want to do. For example, parents complain about the lazy child who does not help them, not willing to learn and so the husband accuses his wife that she has launched a home, a wife scolds her husband, who spend days lying on the couch and she in no way help .. . And so about a boss who is angry with his subordinates for their lack of zeal in the workplace, and say nothing. And the seemingly "extreme" degree of laziness - even when a person "to look after themselves' reluctance.
But in this case, you should understand: the man himself and needed the work that forced him to do? Tell whether a child for help even a simple thank you? Understand whether the teenager why he personally should learn, or does it under duress only for parents?Does his wife clean up at the house where she mistress? It is pleasant for a man to be his wife "on the premises," especially if the wife shows excessive zeal in economic matters?
As for the laziness in the workplace, so often seem to be subordinate to the chief orders frankly useless or employees are not interested in the work performed drinking alcohol (say, you still go to the basket or it obviously will not be paid accordingly to the performance).
A "watch yourself" often lazy when it is not for someone to do it: to preen themselves do not want to (well, not like yourself so people), and do not need more because it was at this time for something (it's unclear which) started take a bad turn in his personal life, something no longer hold in the existing relationship or gradually began to disappear hope that you all anyone needs, etc.
In these three groups of somehow includes the following types of laziness:
Laziness as a sign of inconsistency and the nature of the structure of personality (for example, if a demonstrative man to limit the work only at home, and make the introvert is constantly working with people - they soon lost the desire to do such work).Laziness (or rather, apathy) as a sign of the so-called cyclothymia (periodic change of activity and depression), which occurs precisely in the depressive phase. Tsiklotimik in the phase activity can do several things in succession, and in a phase of depression does not even what is required to do under the contracts (which are picked up in the active phase). By the way, cyclothymia typical activities such as personality.Laziness as a prospective pleasure: you do not want to change what you are somehow beneficial. For example, you suffer for its excess weight, but too lazy to get rid of it: if the weight loss, what, then, to complain and explain what his failures in his personal life?Finally, the same notorious sloth parasite, which is expressed in the saying, "Who do much, let us make on us." Why do something if you ever find one who will do it for you, anything with you without asking for it?But if we talk about laziness as a vice, then, perhaps, the worst of its kind - is lazy mind. When just too lazy to think - what, how and why you do. In this case, the man rolling on the life of inertia, even if his life has become unpleasant to him. But to change it, you need to attend to it - and think he felt like it.
You can change your job to the best - but it must be waged Well a lot of negotiation, to reflect where and when to call, how to tell about yourself, and think about laziness. In addition to high-paying jobs require new skills and develop them - laziness.
Or, for example, a woman can automatically engage in housework, and hateful, and to condemn everyone in the house that they do not help her (and eventually get this shrew). And think about how to help motivate her home, - laziness.
Or the child, making the same lessons, bluntly notch "from now and until now," and that he had learned and how it can apply in life - think of laziness ...
That's just a lazy most dangerous of all. But, alas, tend to suffer from it do not consider myself lazy, or not they have a lazy and do not suffer alone blame others for what they themselves are not everything in life as they would like. Incidentally, one of the most famous sayings "Laziness, open the door, burn. - Though burned, but shall not be opened!" exactly to the variety of laziness most suitable man to be tortured and tormented myself other, but think about why his life so bad, and somehow attend to himself, that he was better - again, too lazy! And if there is intellectual laziness craving for activity (on the principle of "what is there to think - have to shake"), we get the same thing that roughly commonly called "fool the initiative."
... And you should definitely add that as lazy evaluation category in the society is highly susceptible to the influence of the notorious double standard: when some criteria for male behavior, and the other for women. In particular, narrow-minded point of view if they might be called lazy man who came home from work and immediately went to his "three T" (TV, slippers, couch) - then no direct reproach, and in extreme cases with a sneer. And basically justify his laziness that he "came home from work."
A "good wife", they say, must be constantly spinning, spin around the house, and if allowed to lie on his bed, leaving the dishes unwashed at the time - lazy! (By the way, "lazy" in common usage is also called a mop for cleaning floors with a long handle - say, hard-working hostess always washes her hands and floors are not too lazy to bend down.) But here again appears as laziness of the mind, and moreover, not women someone who does not take the trouble to think, as appropriate, and with less effort and time to organize the infamous decision of domestic issues.
Remember, by the way, all the jokes about what a woman has a headache. Aside from the headache as a way to protect itself at all in the bed of a hated husband (that's another story) and consider only the situation of chronic fatigue - in fact, why not head sick?Indeed, often in nagruzochka housewives really a-go-go, and to minimize it is not always possible: become a floor mop - lazy, like heavy bags from the store to deliver the machine and not on myself - lazy ... And a husband spoke in general textbook: when his wife asked him to buy a washing machine, he indignantly exclaimed: "Well, it is necessary, lenischa which can not handle wash!"
True, these men, too, can understand if you try. After all, what all the household appliances, if you remember about laziness as an engine of progress? It is true, to save time and effort. But why this man time and energy of his wife? While the wife wipes or washes "handles," it seems as if the case. And if all this will do for her technique, so liberated from my wife will have to somehow communicate. Maybe the theater to go with it, maybe the same sex to do, and maybe just talk "to life", as two close friends ... And he needs it?? His wife - a stranger and walking with her will not want to.Sex with her husband for a long time was only a "marital duty". And talk to him and his wife about. But if, God forbid, liberated woman somewhere in the work to be arranged, will receive a social value to attract the attention of someone else - but just become too independent and is in itself one day send a man to hell?
So, on its own intellectual laziness does not want to think about what a family has a problem - much easier to nail the wife to the family galley and "thanks" several times a day, call it lazy to place their know!
... But in fairness it should be noted that it is often with precisely the opposite: his wife day and night "saws" of the faithful, that he de quitter - not making money! And far from clear that the husband all day lying on the couch - he can work and to earn money, but his main problem is that it is very hard to bear the responsibilities of breadwinner and provider. And then, contrary to expectation, he did this may not be able to ...
Have already said, that the infamous "double standard" - a double edged sword that beats to paraphrase Nekrasov, "at one end by a woman, the other by a peasant." That is what the male sex, we considered the "master" and his representatives are not easy!
At least one of the postulates of "double standards" states that if there is no money in the family - clearly guilty man. And none of this man does not ask whether he wants to live in luxury, whether in general engage in some business, is able to earn if at all? And my wife has a sort of "moral right" to reproach him of laziness - because he does not bring into the house as much money as she chooses. And the wife has no idea that her "education" is precisely the reason is her husband's inaction, saying that once she was so strict, "Mommy," again she teaches and educates me - then let her, my mother, myself and my feeds, and dresses, and has!
Generally in such conflicts is either lazy man's "incompatibility of work and personality," or lack of motivation. Again, it turns out that this is actually the result of intellectual laziness of his wife. In other words, dear wife, if the husband brings home, in your opinion, not enough money (and he does not suffer), it is primarily a problem of yours. And solve it for you. And the rest against the generally accepted postulate "a man should be breadwinner" - the most hopeless!
Much benefit - think about why your husband does not seek to achieve more and how to change this? How to make sure that he wanted to learn it (if you can not), how to help him on a "one head is good, two is better." (Not to mention the fact that the family business to become an equal partner.) How, after all, make sure that he wanted to earn money for you and spend on you? And if you think it fails, it may be prudent to change her husband, once so that you do not like?
... So, probably, it is clear that laziness - it's not a typical problem that can be solved in one fell swoop. And advice on "how to get rid of laziness or most of it to save someone else" will not unambiguous, and perhaps not at all simple.
No man will do what he dislikes is not necessary or profitable. So the best way to influence someone else's "laziness" - a famous phrase from the movie "Mimino": "You do me good - then I'll make you so good that we both will be good!" In other words, even if one of you one way or another dependent, it is not reasonable to make, namely, to motivate, to cause interest in a particular work (and not always and not only material). In addition, as a rule, work will be done not only in time but also better quality. And if you think that you and so it is sufficient to motivate, but he's still lazy - hence the motivation or insufficient, either for the individual is irrelevant.If you are using so-called motivated by fear, keep in mind that this is not always effective, and sometimes can backfire. If you say, the slave, 'Do such and such a report by the deadline will not do - fire you, "it may well be that you have to do so (even if in fact this fellow to you is very valuable and you would not like to leave it .) It is possible that his negligence has arisen just because he did not really work, then the soul, and he himself in thought, not to leave him there. That's just not dare to make the final step - and then you like him would have helped!And even if the subordinate (husband, wife, child, etc.) you are not gone, he probably will look for ways to socially acceptable to evade your pressure. By the way, the most common way is by far ... the disease. At first the disease may be trivial, if not far-fetched, but then sickness can find all the more real evidence, and then take a protracted nature, and will move in somatisation depression. And you get very sick man who is never a good feeling and so it is very difficult to do something with his request.In general, starting to "fight against laziness" (whatever his or someone else), you must determine what is its nature. We are here talking about the many varieties of sloth, and to get rid of this quality, try to figure out what caused it. Decide if possible even with those whose problem in the case is lazy - your or your loved ones? It prevents someone who is to attend to in order to remove it?The most frequent complaints on their own laziness - the first sign of "workaholic" who needs a rest. You can use the board as a humorous phrase: "Do not put off till tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow." Not a sin and sometimes allow themselves "lazy" - to sleep, read, etc. If only because that job then go better and faster. As the saying goes, "better day to lose, then fly for five minutes." (Alas, it is very difficult to understand and accept those whose workaholism is straightforward escape from his own psychological problems.)If you call your lazy relatives, employees, boss, etc., think about why. Sometimes there is such a thing: as you diligently worked or still occasionally call you lazy - as the saying goes, "prevention". But if someone important to you people talking about your laziness (seemingly in good faith and even with a touch of love), consider: is this love love the rider to the horse?And in any case, if the "do nothing and do not want to lose heart," it may be wise to stop and think about what you are doing and that you are in this can be confusing. At the very least, do not show themselves that same laziness of the mind - do not persist in the fact that for some reason does not work! Analyze (perhaps together with an expert-therapist), why it happens. Why, after all, you have no incentive to live, why you feel that you are going in the wrong direction - and what should go just for your personal growth, for your happiness and your sense of freedom?
The same thing happens when the body tries to recover at least partially - that is, the workflow goes, but with reduced intensity. And the man again began reproaching himself, sits up overtime to make up for its slow pace, doing everything from fatigue more slowly allows more errors, etc. It seems to work, but no results. It turns an "imitation of violent activity," and frankly unhealthy.
HOW LAZINESS lack of motivation. Typically, this is a consequence of unconscious resistance to the man who in his heart suddenly begins to feel that sort of not quite go up and not doing something. In such cases, to accuse him of laziness begin around - particularly those who need it to perform the work that he does not want to do. For example, parents complain about the lazy child who does not help them, not willing to learn and so the husband accuses his wife that she has launched a home, a wife scolds her husband, who spend days lying on the couch and she in no way help .. . And so about a boss who is angry with his subordinates for their lack of zeal in the workplace, and say nothing. And the seemingly "extreme" degree of laziness - even when a person "to look after themselves' reluctance.
But in this case, you should understand: the man himself and needed the work that forced him to do? Tell whether a child for help even a simple thank you? Understand whether the teenager why he personally should learn, or does it under duress only for parents?Does his wife clean up at the house where she mistress? It is pleasant for a man to be his wife "on the premises," especially if the wife shows excessive zeal in economic matters?
As for the laziness in the workplace, so often seem to be subordinate to the chief orders frankly useless or employees are not interested in the work performed drinking alcohol (say, you still go to the basket or it obviously will not be paid accordingly to the performance).
A "watch yourself" often lazy when it is not for someone to do it: to preen themselves do not want to (well, not like yourself so people), and do not need more because it was at this time for something (it's unclear which) started take a bad turn in his personal life, something no longer hold in the existing relationship or gradually began to disappear hope that you all anyone needs, etc.
In these three groups of somehow includes the following types of laziness:
Laziness as a sign of inconsistency and the nature of the structure of personality (for example, if a demonstrative man to limit the work only at home, and make the introvert is constantly working with people - they soon lost the desire to do such work).Laziness (or rather, apathy) as a sign of the so-called cyclothymia (periodic change of activity and depression), which occurs precisely in the depressive phase. Tsiklotimik in the phase activity can do several things in succession, and in a phase of depression does not even what is required to do under the contracts (which are picked up in the active phase). By the way, cyclothymia typical activities such as personality.Laziness as a prospective pleasure: you do not want to change what you are somehow beneficial. For example, you suffer for its excess weight, but too lazy to get rid of it: if the weight loss, what, then, to complain and explain what his failures in his personal life?Finally, the same notorious sloth parasite, which is expressed in the saying, "Who do much, let us make on us." Why do something if you ever find one who will do it for you, anything with you without asking for it?But if we talk about laziness as a vice, then, perhaps, the worst of its kind - is lazy mind. When just too lazy to think - what, how and why you do. In this case, the man rolling on the life of inertia, even if his life has become unpleasant to him. But to change it, you need to attend to it - and think he felt like it.
You can change your job to the best - but it must be waged Well a lot of negotiation, to reflect where and when to call, how to tell about yourself, and think about laziness. In addition to high-paying jobs require new skills and develop them - laziness.
Or, for example, a woman can automatically engage in housework, and hateful, and to condemn everyone in the house that they do not help her (and eventually get this shrew). And think about how to help motivate her home, - laziness.
Or the child, making the same lessons, bluntly notch "from now and until now," and that he had learned and how it can apply in life - think of laziness ...
That's just a lazy most dangerous of all. But, alas, tend to suffer from it do not consider myself lazy, or not they have a lazy and do not suffer alone blame others for what they themselves are not everything in life as they would like. Incidentally, one of the most famous sayings "Laziness, open the door, burn. - Though burned, but shall not be opened!" exactly to the variety of laziness most suitable man to be tortured and tormented myself other, but think about why his life so bad, and somehow attend to himself, that he was better - again, too lazy! And if there is intellectual laziness craving for activity (on the principle of "what is there to think - have to shake"), we get the same thing that roughly commonly called "fool the initiative."
... And you should definitely add that as lazy evaluation category in the society is highly susceptible to the influence of the notorious double standard: when some criteria for male behavior, and the other for women. In particular, narrow-minded point of view if they might be called lazy man who came home from work and immediately went to his "three T" (TV, slippers, couch) - then no direct reproach, and in extreme cases with a sneer. And basically justify his laziness that he "came home from work."
A "good wife", they say, must be constantly spinning, spin around the house, and if allowed to lie on his bed, leaving the dishes unwashed at the time - lazy! (By the way, "lazy" in common usage is also called a mop for cleaning floors with a long handle - say, hard-working hostess always washes her hands and floors are not too lazy to bend down.) But here again appears as laziness of the mind, and moreover, not women someone who does not take the trouble to think, as appropriate, and with less effort and time to organize the infamous decision of domestic issues.
Remember, by the way, all the jokes about what a woman has a headache. Aside from the headache as a way to protect itself at all in the bed of a hated husband (that's another story) and consider only the situation of chronic fatigue - in fact, why not head sick?Indeed, often in nagruzochka housewives really a-go-go, and to minimize it is not always possible: become a floor mop - lazy, like heavy bags from the store to deliver the machine and not on myself - lazy ... And a husband spoke in general textbook: when his wife asked him to buy a washing machine, he indignantly exclaimed: "Well, it is necessary, lenischa which can not handle wash!"
True, these men, too, can understand if you try. After all, what all the household appliances, if you remember about laziness as an engine of progress? It is true, to save time and effort. But why this man time and energy of his wife? While the wife wipes or washes "handles," it seems as if the case. And if all this will do for her technique, so liberated from my wife will have to somehow communicate. Maybe the theater to go with it, maybe the same sex to do, and maybe just talk "to life", as two close friends ... And he needs it?? His wife - a stranger and walking with her will not want to.Sex with her husband for a long time was only a "marital duty". And talk to him and his wife about. But if, God forbid, liberated woman somewhere in the work to be arranged, will receive a social value to attract the attention of someone else - but just become too independent and is in itself one day send a man to hell?
So, on its own intellectual laziness does not want to think about what a family has a problem - much easier to nail the wife to the family galley and "thanks" several times a day, call it lazy to place their know!
... But in fairness it should be noted that it is often with precisely the opposite: his wife day and night "saws" of the faithful, that he de quitter - not making money! And far from clear that the husband all day lying on the couch - he can work and to earn money, but his main problem is that it is very hard to bear the responsibilities of breadwinner and provider. And then, contrary to expectation, he did this may not be able to ...
Have already said, that the infamous "double standard" - a double edged sword that beats to paraphrase Nekrasov, "at one end by a woman, the other by a peasant." That is what the male sex, we considered the "master" and his representatives are not easy!
At least one of the postulates of "double standards" states that if there is no money in the family - clearly guilty man. And none of this man does not ask whether he wants to live in luxury, whether in general engage in some business, is able to earn if at all? And my wife has a sort of "moral right" to reproach him of laziness - because he does not bring into the house as much money as she chooses. And the wife has no idea that her "education" is precisely the reason is her husband's inaction, saying that once she was so strict, "Mommy," again she teaches and educates me - then let her, my mother, myself and my feeds, and dresses, and has!
Generally in such conflicts is either lazy man's "incompatibility of work and personality," or lack of motivation. Again, it turns out that this is actually the result of intellectual laziness of his wife. In other words, dear wife, if the husband brings home, in your opinion, not enough money (and he does not suffer), it is primarily a problem of yours. And solve it for you. And the rest against the generally accepted postulate "a man should be breadwinner" - the most hopeless!
Much benefit - think about why your husband does not seek to achieve more and how to change this? How to make sure that he wanted to learn it (if you can not), how to help him on a "one head is good, two is better." (Not to mention the fact that the family business to become an equal partner.) How, after all, make sure that he wanted to earn money for you and spend on you? And if you think it fails, it may be prudent to change her husband, once so that you do not like?
... So, probably, it is clear that laziness - it's not a typical problem that can be solved in one fell swoop. And advice on "how to get rid of laziness or most of it to save someone else" will not unambiguous, and perhaps not at all simple.
No man will do what he dislikes is not necessary or profitable. So the best way to influence someone else's "laziness" - a famous phrase from the movie "Mimino": "You do me good - then I'll make you so good that we both will be good!" In other words, even if one of you one way or another dependent, it is not reasonable to make, namely, to motivate, to cause interest in a particular work (and not always and not only material). In addition, as a rule, work will be done not only in time but also better quality. And if you think that you and so it is sufficient to motivate, but he's still lazy - hence the motivation or insufficient, either for the individual is irrelevant.If you are using so-called motivated by fear, keep in mind that this is not always effective, and sometimes can backfire. If you say, the slave, 'Do such and such a report by the deadline will not do - fire you, "it may well be that you have to do so (even if in fact this fellow to you is very valuable and you would not like to leave it .) It is possible that his negligence has arisen just because he did not really work, then the soul, and he himself in thought, not to leave him there. That's just not dare to make the final step - and then you like him would have helped!And even if the subordinate (husband, wife, child, etc.) you are not gone, he probably will look for ways to socially acceptable to evade your pressure. By the way, the most common way is by far ... the disease. At first the disease may be trivial, if not far-fetched, but then sickness can find all the more real evidence, and then take a protracted nature, and will move in somatisation depression. And you get very sick man who is never a good feeling and so it is very difficult to do something with his request.In general, starting to "fight against laziness" (whatever his or someone else), you must determine what is its nature. We are here talking about the many varieties of sloth, and to get rid of this quality, try to figure out what caused it. Decide if possible even with those whose problem in the case is lazy - your or your loved ones? It prevents someone who is to attend to in order to remove it?The most frequent complaints on their own laziness - the first sign of "workaholic" who needs a rest. You can use the board as a humorous phrase: "Do not put off till tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow." Not a sin and sometimes allow themselves "lazy" - to sleep, read, etc. If only because that job then go better and faster. As the saying goes, "better day to lose, then fly for five minutes." (Alas, it is very difficult to understand and accept those whose workaholism is straightforward escape from his own psychological problems.)If you call your lazy relatives, employees, boss, etc., think about why. Sometimes there is such a thing: as you diligently worked or still occasionally call you lazy - as the saying goes, "prevention". But if someone important to you people talking about your laziness (seemingly in good faith and even with a touch of love), consider: is this love love the rider to the horse?And in any case, if the "do nothing and do not want to lose heart," it may be wise to stop and think about what you are doing and that you are in this can be confusing. At the very least, do not show themselves that same laziness of the mind - do not persist in the fact that for some reason does not work! Analyze (perhaps together with an expert-therapist), why it happens. Why, after all, you have no incentive to live, why you feel that you are going in the wrong direction - and what should go just for your personal growth, for your happiness and your sense of freedom?
